While stress can either hinder or help us, we often fail to recognise it.
Stress is a normal physical reaction that disturbs our balance in some way, which triggers our natural “flight or fight” response mode. And it can help us stay focused, energetic and alert, says love and life therapist Dr Sherry Marshall.
"But beyond a certain point stress stops being helpful and starts causing major damage to your health, your mood, your productivity, your relationships, and your quality of life," says Marshall.
It's important we know how to cope with stress – but first we need to recognise when we're stressed.
So how do we know if we are stressed?
Stress counsellor Jacqueline Stone says we're stressed when we are in that “buzzy, 'flight, fight or freed' mode” for a sustained period of time.
The problem is we can be too stressed to realise how stressed we are.
"The pace that we go these days, people tend not to notice they are under stress," says Stone.
She says that sleep problems – including trouble falling asleep, or poor sleep quality – are common signs of the condition.
Another big indicator is digestion. As Stone says, the opposite of the fight or flight mode is “active, rest and digest mode”.
"When you're in rest and digest mode you can rest, relax, sleep, and you are digesting readily,” she says.
Stress also affects your appetite, and Stone says it can go either way: “People either eat too much, too little, or the wrong thing.”
When your productivity is impacted and you can't concentrate or think clearly, it's time to take action.
Here are seven healthy ways to help beat stress:
Get out in nature
When life gets busy we don't often have time to stop and smell the roses, but research has shown that being in nature can reduce stress. Stone says, "When you're in fight/flight mode you aren't in tune with your senses and sensations. If you get out into nature, your senses will switch on and your body will get into rest and digest mode."
Exercise
A Harvard research project followed 268 men for over 72 years and found exercise to be one of the key components to having a good life. It doesn't have to be a massive workout: Stone says that as little as 20-30 minutes a day can have a positive impact.
Spend time with friends and family
Often when people are stressed, depressive symptoms can take hold. What goes with that is an inclination to withdraw, says Stone. "It's really important to counteract these feelings and interact with family and friends, even if you don't feel like it,” she advises.
Meditate
Meditation teaches us to be more present while increasing our mindfulness and awareness, which makes us happier. As Sherry Marshall says, when we meditate “we begin to simplify more and stop rushing around so much, which enables us to let go of unnecessary 'extras' in our lives”.
Laugh
Laughter really is a great stress buster, so see a funny movie or hang out with friends who you can rely on for a laugh. “It strengthens your immune system, reduces cortisol [the steroid hormone released in response to stress] in your body, makes you more alert, and also reduces pain by releasing endorphins,” Marshall says.
Go easy on yourself
A big part of stress is the stress we cause for ourselves. “Stop beating up on yourself; stop giving yourself a hard time,” says Stone. “We go at million times an hour then give ourselves a hard time.”
In her TED Talk, Dr Kristin Neff says often we are crueller to ourselves then we would be to someone we don't like.
“Self-criticism releases a lot of cortisol," she says. "If you are a constant self-critic you have constantly high levels of stress and eventually, the body, to protect itself will shut itself down and become depressed to deal with all the stress.
“When we give ourselves compassion we actually reduce our cortisol levels and release oxytocins and opiates, the feel-good hormones,” she says.
Physical contact
Oxytocin is a hormone released through touch that can reduce stress levels, so try to get this circulating in your system. “Massage can reduce tension and is also a way of tuning in and getting back into your body, rather than being stuck in your head,” says Jacqueline Stone.
